12/15/09

Bearable Vastness of Being


Bearable Vastness of Being


One of my favorite movies is Contact, taken from the novel by Carl Sagan. Ellie is an orphan who believes only what she can prove scientifically. In the end she has an experience that changes her into a person of faith, believing what she cannot prove. In the end she says, ""For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love" . Some people are afraid of vast places, big sky country, or staring down from high places. I understand these fears. For me it is heights that make my knees weak. Also when I am driving on an interstate and it spreads out to four or five lanes on each side. Perhaps it is the fear of losing control because there are too many lanes and cars to watch. I am not sure. Playing soothing music - such as instrumental hymns helps me slow my heart rate down. I pray for my safety and for the safety of others around me and try to breath and let God be in control. God has given me control of a car but I still have fear. Humans have made so many things to make our labors lighter and faster. Perhaps our fears have to do with putting trust in our own creations or putting trust in ourselves.

I feel the closest to God when I am in big sky country, with the stars spanning the skies - hugging me all around. I guess we all have our times where the vastness is unbearable or times and places where the vastness is not only bearable but peaceful and reassuring.

Psalm 8 says that we have been created to control many things on this earth but I guess the key is to know that it is God who created everything and controls everything ~ and everyone.


"Lord our Lord, your name is the most wonderful name in all the earth!
It brings you praise in heaven above. ....I look at your heavens,
which you made with your fingers. I see the moon and stars,
which you created. But why are people even important to you?
Why do you take care of human beings? You made them a little lower than the angels
and crowned them with glory and honor.
You put them in charge of everything you made. You put all things under their control: all the sheep, the cattle,
and the wild animals, the birds in the sky, the fish in the sea,
and everything that lives under water. Lord our Lord,
your name is the most wonderful name in all the earth! " Psalm 8


Lord God, I am so unworthy to be called your child, your creation. I do not honor your creation sometimes and race forward through the day until I am tired and full of fear. I try to cope by eating, and like a car that is out of control on the interstate - my life once again, feels out of control. The more I get out into the world to do your work, the more I am tempted to do things using my own power and reasoning. This only causes me to fail more. Please Lord, help me to start each task with the goal of glorifying you only. I need your love more than anything else. Thank you for showing me that love in the life, death, and resurrection of your perfect Lamb, your Son. Your name is truly wonderful! Through Jesus name I pray today, Amen.

No comments: