Magnify Christ

Magnify Christ
Someone once said: "There is no way of telling the amount of good we could do if we didn't care who gets the credit." The movies, TV shows, and the world in general is a competitive battle ground. People "take sides" about every issue and the competitive spirit is honored and encouraged beginning with toddlers and pre-schoolers. Even at the Medifast clinic pictures and pounds lost are posted, with the "biggest loser" for the week spotlighted. I have been down that road so many times. If my motivation comes from a competitive spirit - my weight loss will fail in the end. One of the winners of "The Biggest Loser" gained back almost 200 pounds! Why? Because competition is not a lasting motivator or the answer to filling the void in someone's life. Someone asked me why I don't put my name in this blog, post the pictures of my weightloss. The purpose of this blog is to document my search. I am writing down my journey to the wellspring that quenches my thirst, the only place where my hunger can be filled. Even though I am placing personal thoughts and experiences down - they are flawed, inconsistent ramblings of someone searching for a daily answer. Any time I place my picture displaying my weightloss progress up for people to see - it is followed by a spell of overeating. That is because all glory, all honor has to be Christ's - not mine.

Over and over again throughout the Bible - God gets the glory - not people. 2 Peter 3:18, "grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever!" God and Christ get the glory, they are the winners - not people, not Christians. I am just a "cracked, dirty pot" that has been cleansed. Anything that is good that I do, any success - is Christ in me. That is hard to remember when the world has an "us versus they" attitude. So I go back to the scriptures to help me fight the influence of the world. Romans 15 Paul talks about success in bringing the Word of God to unbelievers: "Looking back over what has been accomplished and what I have observed, I must say I am most pleased—in the context of Jesus, I'd even say proud, but only in that context. I have no interest in giving you a chatty account of my adventures, only the wondrously powerful and transformingly present words and deeds of Christ in me that triggered a believing response among the outsiders." (The Message) So that is the answer to weight loss.... the "powerful and transformingly present words and deeds of Christ" - The words and deeds of Christ magnified in me = the only success that has meaning or substance. Everything else leaves a void and that leads to more uncontrollable hunger and thirst.

Dear Lord, help me today to be encouraged by the zeal and success in others. Transform my competitive spirit, my inclination to outdo others. Help me to focus on the power of true success ~ Christ in me. Transform me today and everyday and may any success magnify God's glory and diminish my part, my efforts. I am just an earthen vessel begging to be filled with Your power. I don't deserve Your love and mercy. I do want to lose weight so much but I keep trying to do it to please others or myself. I know that is the way of failure. I can only succeed with Your help and if it is Your will for me on this earth. It is in the name of Your glorious Son that I come to you today in prayer, Amen.

Fix Your Heart Toward Heaven

Fix Your Heart Toward Heaven

"And it came to pass, when the time had come that He should be received up, He steadfastly set His face to go to Jerusalem" Luke 9:51

As a MK (military kid) I knew what it meant to "about face" and "toe the line". When I became a teacher I tried to bring the best part of that experience, that sense of structure and order into the classroom. My students knew the rules, they knew the consequences, they knew I cared about each and every one of them. My prayer every day was that they would learn how to focus on what was important in life: learning to use their God given talents to the glory of the Lord and learn the joy of serving others. With a secure classroom environment, students can spend time focusing on what is important. The power struggles seldom happen because each child is challenged to focus on their personal goals of success. They are rewarded with compliments, good grades, and confidence.

In the passage above Jesus had just held a child and told the disciples that the least would be the greatest. Jesus knew His time was coming near and his steadfast, resolute focus, His face was set to go - to Jerusalem - to His death. One version translates it "he gathered up his courage and steeled himself ".

My focus has recently wavered from the goal: seeking the Lord's answer for my weightloss, feasting on God's word each and every day, "turning a hunger and thirst for love into a spiritual feast that replaces emotional eating habits". So, once again, I gather up my courage and look to "Jerusalem" - I look to the goal of heaven and turn away from my sinful life, my destructive habits, and failure. I am tired of traveling through life looking in the rear view mirror.

Now - as a survivor, I have had a great deal of road kill to deal with in the last few weeks of this journey. I was moving along at a good pace and then found something dragging, dangling, and making noise as I was moving forward. I had to stop and figure out what was slowing me down again, what was causing anger to strip my gears again. It can be discouraging to build up speed and feel joyful and to feel free and then hit a wall of memories or (even more frightening) brand new, positive feelings. New places and experiences can be scary and cause uncertainty. But if I keep my eyes focused on the destination, heavenward ~ I know that I will find the pit stops don't hurt quite as much with each day that I travel toward "Jeruselem".

With God's help I will keep my eyes on the prize - "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus" Philippians 3:14 Heavenward is a forward gear - not reverse!

Lord, I come before you again today asking for your help. I am having a hard time focusing on the goal - setting my face toward heaven. Please forgive me for getting weighed down again in failure, the pain of the past, and dragging with me the bloody memories of the little girl that was run over by life. Lord, each time a new memory overtakes me, help me to look to Your healing heart and move forward - even though it is so tiring. Anger is my greatest enemy. Lord, I give that anger to You. You are a just and merciful God and I leave judgement in Your hands. Help me to learn to forgive as I was forgiven. ~ In Christ's name I pray, Amen.

On Eagle's Wings

Day Seven

I realize that some days I will not be able to write a blog entry. The Medifast diet for diabetics is really the best for me. Like I have said before - I prayed about what to do and this worked for me over a decade ago until my weightloss and other issues led to my divorce. The last two days on this diet have sent my blood sugar on a roller coaster ride. I stayed in bed most of one day but tried to eat and stay on the program. I carefully monitored my blood sugar levels. Could it be that my body is getting used to the shakes? I am not used to eating every 2 hours. Could this be the problem?

As I napped and read, the thought of "eagles wings" kept coming to mind. I need to be "raised up on eagle's wings" every day ~ held in the palm of God's hands.

Lord Almighty, hold me up and help me from plunging into deep depression today. I want to live a new, healthy life with You. Please guide me as I go through these feelings that are brought to mind when food is the issue and the past scars keep past hurts walled up. Set me free so that I might be of service to You, so that I can open my arms wide and love others. I know Lord that my path lies to the foot of the cross and salvation comes from Jesus and his sacrificial offering for my sins, my past, and my disfunctional life. It is through His name I pray this prayer today, Amen.